May/June-
Two weeks ago it was 98 degrees, and today it is 68. I respect the chaos that is the pattern of this summer’s weather. I’m wearing socks and a wool blanket in addition to the usual garb. My house is 63 degrees right now, but by next Monday it will be 85 in here before the sun sets and I’ll be taking cold showers before bed.
At the end of April I went home to Illinois for the first time in over two years. Every time I visit I’m more charmed by it. I stayed with my sister in her beautiful house. It is wooden and warm and has a conversation pit which I rarely crawled out of unless it was to go eat, pee, or spend time outside in the wind. Which was mostly the weather while I was there. Wind. Wind. Wind. But I usually find poor weather charming while traveling, and this was no exception. Wind makes me feel things even if I don’t think I’m ready to. It disrupts walls.
I hadn’t seen my dad, my older sister, my niece, or my best friend in over two years. I met my two year old brother on this trip (confirmed: very cute, very sweet, very cuddly). I squeezed in a quick trip right before the farm got a little crazy, and I’m so glad I did. Two and a half days of catching up, laughing, crying, reminiscing, and eating at all of the places I miss while I’m away. I cooked dinner for all of us one night which I intended to be an act of love but I think mostly made everyone annoyed with me because they actually just wanted to hang out with me and not wait for me to finish cooking. Love is boundless and Time is always trying to put it’s hands around Love’s neck. The moments when they are holding each other's hands is Peace, or at the very least, Ease.
Girls, girls, girls. It always has been and always will be this way. I’ve been surrounded by them my entire life and I can’t imagine it any other way. The women in my life are the source of so much of my joy. I’m so grateful that I was born into a life with sisters, and that I’ve grown up alongside so many amazing women. To continue to get to know them and meet them and evolve with them is a gift. I learn so much from my mom, my sisters, my friends! A periodic trip home is so necessary for learning about yourself. It was balm for my heart that I didn’t know I needed.
I returned home to Idaho — to blooms and more blooms. It will continue to be this way until ideally a late October frost, and I am comforted by that timeline. I’m working every day with one, sometimes two, sometimes three of my favorite people. It looks exactly like the photos above, in addition to:
-A lot of dirt, a lot of sweat, and very little sleep
-Hot, forgotten yogurt and granola left in the sun
-The general waning an waxing, high and low tides of mood that aren’t well hidden from people that you work directly next to for hours on end with only your thoughts, hopes, fears, favorite music, and podcasts to indulge in
-Achey, achey muscles
I’d honestly have it no other way. I can’t think of a single thing I would change in that regard, and I think it’s nice to sit with the things I’d leave unchanged every now and again. I think a lot about how to improve things, push things forward, etc. and sometimes it’s nice to just sit with what is good. Probably Love and Time holding hands.
I started writing this post in early June. It’s now the end of July. The 27th.
Our friends Lila + Alex got married at the new flower farm, Sun Dog, in the middle of June. It was beautiful. It was intimate — maybe 10 of us were present for the ceremony. I can’t imagine a ceremony any other way now. The reception that followed was much bigger and full of friends and food and drink. It was such a special weekend that felt like a true initiation into summer. I love love. I love weddings, especially when you can tell they’re a reflection of the two people putting it all on, and this one very much was.
The farm looked like this during the ceremony:
And now it looks like this:
So, we are quite busy. It’s been glorious. The flowers look amazing which is a relief considering last year’s disease and dead zinnias/strawflower/failed dahlias. We are growing in new soil which is always a gamble. Well I guess it’s not a gamble if you’re one of those people that does soil tests to see what you are in for. We did not see what we were in for. We just blindly hoped, and it turned out pretty great. But we have lots of plans for cover-cropping, crop rotating, and building healthy, beautiful soil.
This year there are four of us on flower crew, three full time, one part time. Past years there have only ever been two people working full time in addition to some occasional and unpredictable help. I feel so proud of what we’ve accomplished as a crew this year. Jess, Grace, and Ellie are heaven sent. They are sincere and silly and really good at their jobs. They make me laaaaugh. They love the farm. I’m lucky to get to share in the wonder of it all with them every day. They are dear to me.
It’s been so exciting to see how the flowers have evolved since I first walked on to the farm in 2018. Davis laid the groundwork and built a world of something so beautiful with the flowers at Fiddler’s. It’s been really special to build upon that foundation and venture into new territory with Sun Dog together. Living and working with a partner is wild, especially with the added stress of being at the mercy of the elements/weather patterns/ and the seasonality of our income. At times it can feel like we’re riding our respective bulls in the same pen, trying to hold on for dear life and not collide with the other’s bull, while simultaneously stealing glances to make sure the other one is holding on okay. When that’s the case, I think we’re still doing a pretty damn good job at it. We fall off sometimes. It’s hard. But, I love it. Which I realize may sound crazy after the bull analogy. But it’s true! I can’t imagine a version of my days that I would prefer to the ones I have right now.
I think this is getting pretty lengthy, so I’ll sum up the rest of the recent summer highlights:
Sun Dog hosted its first work-shop/ farm tour in collaboration with our friend Paige of Wildflower Floral Co. It was a sweet time. Having folks on the farm breathes new life into it, starts adding to the collective memory of the place.
We started up our weekly U-Pick on Wednesdays. This year we’re offering a morning session from 8:30am-10:30am plus an evening sesh from 6:30pm-9:30pm.
Despite being sleepy and arguably overworked, we’ve somewhat successfully maintained regular hangs with friends — from Sunday morning coffee to attending dinner parties and even hosting dinner and farm hangs with friends visiting from out of town. It sounds like small stuff, but it feels like big and special and heart warming stuff.
It feels like we’re in the eye of the summer storm while simultaneously dipping a toe into fall, as farming always manages to accomplish.
To cap it off, here are some moments from the last month and a half.
Xx
ALSO, CORRECTION *evening U-Pick is from 6:30-8:30pm. Not 9:30pm. Don’t stay till 9:30. I love you but I want to go to bed and you need to go home before then.
I’m not on instagram anymore. But the farm is. If you’re interested — @sundog.farm